Driving ’down island’ Monday, January 22, I was flipping through radio stations trying to find something interesting to hear. I paused at an AM station to listen to an interesting couple doing a call and response, tag team show. The topic of discussion was how, that very day, more people suffered from depression than any other day. "Hmmmm," I thought. "How did they figure that one out?"
They claimed people were depressed because, among other reasons, they were already failing at their New Years Resolution. How can that be? Upon deeper contemplation I remembered I had heard it takes 21 days to break a habit. Here we are on the 22nd and most people have failed. Why?
I have learned that the most important component to success is a deep desire to change. Not just mediocre deep, but a desire so deep that there are no obstacles too great to overcome. This desire is usually fuelled by a passion that speaks from the very centre, the core essence of who we are. Once connected to our dream, and with enough belief in the possibility, the world begins to unfold and change occurs. The first 21 days are the biggest part of the journey, for after the commitment is made past this time, a new habit is in place and the rest is easy.
Interestingly, most of us find it much more convenient if family and friends around us change first. Truth be known, that isn’t happening. Not today and not tomorrow. Each of us is the center of our own universe. What we see is filtered through our thoughts, feelings and beliefs. Have you ever been to a great movie and decided it was perfect to take your Mother? On your second viewing along side Mum you notice it is full of sex and/or swear words. At first viewing it didn’t seem all that prevalent so what changed?
You changed. Once you brought your more conservative parent to the show, you became sensitive to their thoughts, feelings and beliefs and suddenly a whole new view point appeared. The movie was the same. The fact is, if we want to change, we have to be the change we want in the world. To do this, we have to discover our passion and claim it for ourselves. Hold on to the dream, remain steadfast, trust and believe that everything we do today is moving us closer to the vision we aspire to achieve. Most important is to have fun along the way, BIG fun! Having fun takes our mind off the future and brings us into the present moment.
Here is what you can choose to get back on track:
1. Take yourself on a date to your favourite quiet place; and in your aloneness, listen to that voice inside as you ask, "What do I want? If I could live the perfect life, what would it look like?
2. Now hold on to that dream. Tuck it away inside and start to write, dream and visualize. Toss it around in your mind each and every day, then ask, "What can I do today that will move me closer to my desire?"
3. Take action, little by little. One step at a time and ask yourself, "Am I having fun?" If the answer is no, then do it differently.
As you become clear on what you desire, you are forever free from the habits of worry, doubt, and fear and I know, depression will be a thing of the past.
Jill Brocklehurst, Licensed Minister at the Centre for Positive Living in Campbell River. Visit the website at www.QICPL.org or email info@QICPL.org.